I so wish I had the power to leave this place and work somewhere where breathing freely and thinking original is not a sin. Living a vegetable life here & following crazy rules, I have ceased to be the person I was just before I came to Bombay to become something. No doubt, I have gained a lot of industry exposure and a lot of knowledge I probably could have not, but this job didn't give me the power I now possess. This was my efforts and not just my employers' gratitude.

But in the process of meeting with professional goals, I have lost my originality completely. I no longer think or try to analyze, hate to see data and observation habit is dying every minute. I just wake up in the morning with bloodshot eyes & a searing headache is always when I leave my bed. I walk upto the washbasin and look at my face and voila! I can't say that it's me!!!!!!!

Then I gather some more strength by lying like a dead body for a few minutes and then I gather my stuff to get on with another useless day when I just don't know what happened during the entire day. And I come to know that the day has finally ended when I am so tired that I just can't walk, pull my feet up and take another stride. Somehow I reach home and just fall dead for another 6-8 hours knowing that is the only peaceful moment in my life. Something has gotta change. I just can't go on living like this, being stupid, plain naive idiot that I am not, being absolutely worthless with no self-esteem left to carry on with. Someday I gotta just do it. When I can't say for sure but that day is coming closer. Somewhere I have already sown the seeds of revolt, but it isn't a reality yet. But soon it will be, I shall be confront my worries and fight them to chase them to death. Let's see who wins...